THIS IS WHY MEN GO TO SPORTS BARS!

Posted: May 3, 2011 in Content, Current Events

The biggest military event since our second invasion of Iraq and ya think the White House would plan better.  What a crappy watch party this looks like.  Every Sunday during the NFL season my house is football central.  I have a few suggestions for the next global crisis:

1)  MORE CHAIRS:  I don’t know who these people are in the back of the room but get a head count before the assassination attempt.  Forty minutes is a long time to stand without a commercial break.

2)  GIVE THE BEST CHAIR TO THE HOST:  Just because you show up with all your medals doesn’t mean you can take the host’s chair.  I suppose you’ll make the President get off his card table chair and pay for the pizza when it shows up too, right?

3)  NO WORK DURING THE BIG EVENT:  You’ve been chasing this Bin-Laden guy for almost eleven years.  Put the lap-tops away and update your facebook page AFTER he’s killed.

4)  SNACKS!!:  This watch party sucks.  Stale coffee and no keg?  Where are the chips? Thirteen people show up and they rely on the host for food?  There has to be a BP outside the White House.  Stop being such a mooch and at least bring a bag of Funions.

5)  HAVE A LITTLE FUN!:  Show your team spirit.  Other than the guy that is hogging the best chair I don’t know which team you are cheering for.  How about a little camo?  Maybe a flag to wave?  How about a giant foam M-16?  The wall is empty.  Missed opportunity to make squares to guess how long into the procedure before we put a couple of slugs into Osama’s dome.  C’mon….be creative!!!

I’m glad we finally got the guy but next time we take out an international terrorist….I’ll be watching at Duffy’s.

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